PSA: Weekends are for you too, mom and dad…
I know you. The workaholic (whether that’s a home hustle or a work hustle) who is counting down for the next weekend, because you burnt yourself out for Labor Day weekend and probably didn’t planning anything for yourself. Usually, when the weekend is just on our horizon, and my mind is racing with activities…for my family.
In my own mind, I envision this…
My family is relaxed, I am relaxed, and we’re spending some quality time together. But then, I get in the way of myself. I start planning ACTIVITIES…
The kind I think Everly wants to do. I cram in a visit to the zoo, Legoland, a road trip, and try to do all the things I feel that I owe her. Then, I feel bad. Why? Because I didn’t plan anything that my husband wanted to do. He’s resorted to his weekend following the crazy schedule of a million ‘activities” that I felt so inclined that we do.
I realized, this was my way of compensating. I was compensating for what I felt I was not giving Everly during the week. I was the militant mom who had a rushed schedule of school drop-off, work, ballet, and swim. I was a no-nonsense, do-not-have-time for dilly-dallying kind-of-mom. So when I had long weekends (or any weekend), I felt the need to make up for that crazy part of me.
I needed to give Everly experiences. But in the process of this, I stressed myself out and over-stimulated her. My husband? He was bored.
And ME? You guessed it…MORE MOM GUILT.
I ended up exhausted. Those jam-packed activities were not so fun for Everly. Of course, I, then, felt bad that she wasn’t having fun. I put myself in the same bad position every time. I was rushed trying to get from one thing to another. It wasn’t worth it anymore…for ANYONE. I’ve now learned, to take these weekends back.
So what are we doing this weekend? ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. And I am okay with that. Being bored is a part of life. Being together to be forced to talk about things you don’t usually get to with your husband is important.
Most importantly, I realized these long weekends are not just for Everly. They are for Justin and me. I am going to let Everly run around in the park while I sit on a blanket and reconnect with my husband. We’re going to cook dinner together. We’re going to have coffee together. Most importantly, we’re going to be rested.
And when we’re rested as a family, and I actually get a chance to spend real, undiluted quality time with my husband (not just Everly). This can still be one of the best experiences Everly can have…watching the relationship of her mom and dad, when things are ordinary.
Things don’t have to be exciting. The calm can teach just as much as the storm of activities. So here’s a reminder to all your parents, who might have struggled with the same over-scheduling habits as me.
If you need a little inspiration for some awesome Staycation ideas, I love this list from Social Mom:
1. Choose Your Fabulous Staycation Destination and Plan Your Itinerary
Use this staycation as an excuse to try out all the spots you’ve been wanting to check out in your own hometown: the new park you haven’t yet visited, the hot new restaurant everyone’s raving about, or even the small museum you’ve been meaning to show the kids. Hold a family meeting and pick some sites you all want to visit, or new activities you want to try. Add them all to your staycation travel itinerary.
2. Transform Your Home into a Hotel
Add a little extra staycation oomph by transforming your home into a hotel. The day before your “departure”, do a deep clean, stock up on minibar-style snacks, and add an extra new little touch to every room (think fresh flowers, a new throw pillow, decorative soaps, or a summer vacation read). Assign the task of turndown service to one kid each day and have some mini-chocolates ready for pillow placement.
Adventuresome families can forget the home hotel and borrow or buy a tent for a campout in the wilds of … the backyard!
3. Spend Time at a Local Swimming Pool or Beach
Ask any kid what their favorite part of staying at a hotel is and they’re bound to reply, “the swimming pool!” Plan on spending some time during your staycation at a new-to-you local swimming pool, water park, or beach. Invest in a few pool toys from your local dollar store to make your staycation swim time all the merrier.
4. Document Your Trip
Just because you aren’t jetting off to a far away destination doesn’t mean you should forgo photos. Take your camera with you where ever you go, and snap lots of shots. Get each of your kids a spiral notebook and encourage them to keep staycation diaries. For each day of your staycation, encourage you kids to write about or draw a picture of their favorite activity.
5. Enjoy the moment
Be mindful on your staycation and focus on finding the joy right before your eyes. Put your phone away, take a social media break, and savor the simple moments with your little ones. Your kids will treasure uninterrupted time with you, no matter the travel destination.
Check out their blog here: https://www.socialmoms.com/live/travel-2/5-simple-steps-to-planning-the-perfect-summer-family-staycation/
Have a staycation. Take this weekend for yourself, and you’ll be surprised just how much your kids enjoy the simple pleasure of being with you.
Thank you so much for your comment! I wish you all the strength and love during this time. Pre-motherhood is…
My first comment on a post but I had been doing the whole “falling down a rabbit hole of online…
Hang in there Mica, keep the faith stronger. God is good, stress won’t help at all, stay optimistic. We love…
[…] to deal with what we had undergone. This is our Part 2 of our story since we were last…
Thank you for the hope. I had a miscarriage last year after not being able to find anything and now…